As far as I can tell, there are two primary methods of ‘doing our days.’
First, we can have them completely structured, planned, full of habits and things to do…things we WANT to do, things we HAVE to do
Or, if you’re more like me, there’s what I refer to as the ‘seat of your pants’ style of living.
And of course, I suppose two other styles include a little bit of both or vacillating beTWEEN the two, which, to be honest, probably is a better way to describe me on most days.
Have you ever read the so-called fact that we are an average of our five closest friends? As I sit here walking my mind through all of my closest friends, not one of them has a seriously disciplined, planned out life…except one.
Marilyn is my exception…and I often tell her she’s my hero. She’s 75 years old and has the next few years completely planned out. She’s actually in the process of building a new home for herself in Michigan. Why is she taking this on now at this point in her life? Because the cabin she planned on living in on her family’s property was starting to rot. She didn’t really have much of a choice in the matter if she wanted to remain on the property so she just got it all planned, designed it herself and off she went on her little house building adventure.
Like I said, she’s my hero.
But…and here’s the big question…would I like to be more like her? The quick answer is ‘no’ but a more thorough answer is honestly, ‘maybe a LITTLE bit more like her.” LOL
For decades, I have had people suggest to me that I could get more accomplished if I’d plan out my days better, structure them a bit more. Every single time someone suggests this my spirit runs and hides under the nearest shade tree! Seriously, nothing could be more unlike my natural nature.
I was probably in my thirties before I started really paying attention to how I did my days.
I watched when I was passionate about something and lost track of time.
I watched when I was committed to something and how nothing could stop me from getting whatever it was that I was committed to done.
I watched, and continue to watch, how I take my own sweet time doing things I have to do but have no desire to do. I’m probably the funniest to watch during these times.
I think people have the wrong idea about procrastination. I think we generally procrastinate doing things we simply don’t want to be doing! If we spent more time doing more things we wanted to be doing, were passionate about or where committed to, we would probably procrastinate less.
It’s just a theory though so don’t quote me!
The fun thing about truly being present with your own daily processes is that you then have choice. You can see which ways lead to more stress and which ways lead to less stress and do more that lead down the less stressful path.
For me, this means that I plan SOME things but not all things. I have discovered, thanks to my partner going through the Tiny Habits Coaching Certification that there is extreme power in what the habit people call Habit Stacking.
Habit stacking has allowed me to put several things in place that really help me stay on task in areas of life that help me feel better while still allowing for my natural tendency to fly by the seat of my pants most days easily and stresslessly (yes, that is a word!).
Habit stacking, by the way, is simply stacking one habit on top of another so you can stick with several habits that help you be healthier, more productive, etc. For me, it’s a way to remember to do several things in a row that work well for me.
Here’s an example…I’m supposed to take a binder an hour or so before I eat anything in the morning. Then, a few minutes before I eat, I have a supplement that I want to use regularly that is in the fridge (which means it’s not visible so I can’t put it somewhere to remind myself to take it). I also have a commitment to end the majority of my showers in cold water (and I mean COLD water and this is easy to do considering it’s winter and our well water is, well, dang cold) as well as start my days with a bit of meditation and/or breathwork.
So, I put the binder by my bed and take it with the glass of water that’s already there as soon as I walk up. I grab my phone to do a meditation and a breathing exercise (I have several I love…Wm Hoff’s app, Insight Timer app, Othership app) and then I get up.
I take a nice hot shower ending with the one minute (or more and honestly, sometimes less) of super cold water, get dressed and go out into the kitchen. There, on the counter is the supplement that my partner has left on the counter for me after he takes his and then I can make some tea or eat in a few minutes or whatever is next.
The majority of my day, unless I have an appointment in town, I allow just to be random. I’m generally committed to a walk in the woods, get some computer work done, feed the chickens, gather their eggs, and other assorted household and work tasks. My days just flow from one thing to another and I don’t worry about getting things done in any particular order because I’ve learned after all this time that I always get everything done that needs to be done. Structuring those things, for me, would just get in my way. I prefer the ebb and flow of just doing what feels like is the next thing to do.
Now the evenings are kind of like my mornings. I have developed some processes in the evening that, like the morning, are fairly ritualistic in nature. Most of us humans love rituals and I’m not exception.
As it gets darker out, we tend to turn off overhead lights. About an hour before bed I light a few candles, turn on some soothing music and do a little yoga. I then go do my before bed things and off to sleep I, hopefully, go. (Sleeping is a whole nother article!).
So how do you do YOUR days? Are you present with your own processes? Are you cognizant of what processes are serving you and which ones aren’t? I know I still have a few that don’t serve me, however, at least I’m quite aware of which ones they are so that I can consciously change them when I’m ready…if I’m every ready.
Share your own processes? What works, what doesn’t work, what gets in your way, etc. Let’s learn from each other.
The most important part is simply that we’re present with what we’re doing moment by moment because only then can we made choices to change and improve them.
I wish for you a pleasant analysis of your own processes in the coming days and weeks as well as improved satisfaction with how you do your own days.
I offer you presence in all things. Thanks for being here…I appreciate you.
Elisabeth…
My personal philosophy…“I question therefore I am.”
Elisabeth, I think you’ve perfectly highlighted how the best days are often the ones that are both planned AND fly by the seat. I too would say that I’m open to what the day brings, but I also have so many small habits (and I didn’t know it, but I’m a habit stacker)!
But I also agree with you, I’ve never procrastinated the things I REALLY wanted.
Just downloaded Insight Timer 🤍
-- Being present with our processes involves embracing each step of our journey with mindfulness and awareness. It’s about immersing ourselves in the current moment, appreciating the unfolding of our tasks or experiences. By cultivating this presence, we open the door to deeper understanding, personal growth, and a richer connection with the world around us. Xo.